still hurting...
i will never forget how happy we were when we found out that i was pregnant. it didn't occur to me that the most unexpected thing will happen. it was october 10, 2005 when we knew that our first little bundle of joy left us. i can't understand why, masakit isipin. even until now that i am writing this post, tears are flowing. my baby doesn't even got a chance to see us, to see his cousins, to play with them, nor even to get hold our hands. he was 14 weeks in my tummy when he left.everybody i knew keep on asking kung masakit ba ang ma- d&c (raspa). 'sabi nila mas mahirap daw yan kesa sa nanganak'. physically, it's not true. i didn't feel any pain. but emotionally yes it's true, napakasakit. traumatic. i just want to fall into deep sleep and not wake up gain.
i want to forget everything that reminds me of my baby, even this blog site, gusto ko na ring burahin and create a new one. pero nanghihinayang ako kasi there are wonderful things here as well lalo na yung sa wedding namin. maybe i should give myself sometime before i can make a final decision.
i know there are reasons why it need to happen. and God has a better plan for us. i just hope everything will turn out fine. and i wish God grant us what we are sincerely asking for. He knows what our hearts desire and will give it to us in His time. We just need to wait for that special time.
posted by Neri @ 11:33 AM
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